This place is twisted and dirty. Like real dirteyyh! If you come here without much of self confidence, personal integrity and personal conviction, this place would high chance do permanent damage to you. Thankfully, its been more of a preparation of the real shit factory ~ the real working world, where all people chase after is wealth and fame by kissing asses.
Glad to say that, I've been to where I am today, without kissing asses. Kissing asses are for losers. Of course, my refusal to kiss ass hasn't made me favourite around here nor has it garnered me mainstream success and recognition. If that's a price I pay to have my integrity intact, then that's a pretty cheap price that I would be more than willing to pay.
Just so you know, when I said its "yours", it really was yours. That huge thing is yours, ain't mine. Honesty came right to you directly when you asked me. Clearly, you were not expecting truth when you asked. Posting a status on Fb and calling me rude ain't gonna make you un-own that piece of thing. News flash, little miss rude here unclogged your piece of thing in the toilet. Why don't you go bitch bout that with your clique of sisters?
#shitfactory #yolo
*clicks Publish*
Saturday 18 January 2014
Friday 10 January 2014
Contentment
Went for this semester's final CG bible study yesterday night. Wasn't planning to go at first given I have one individual's whose submission is due the next day and I'm far from halfway through. No worries, my assignment is done now. Had to re-do it twice in fact cause I got stuck the first time round. So worried as it was in the wee hours and none of my classmates would be awake, but thankfully I got through and finished it all at around 4am plus.
After that, I tossed and turned and it was surprisingly hard to fall asleep. Had been thinking of why am I placed here in Malacca, awful lot this past two weeks or so. And here I thought, I have moved past this topic longggggg agooo. Apparently not! I cannot exactly put a finger on as to why I am here or what am I even doing here. I started reflected back on the past 2 years when I made my move here, all hopeful for a great change, one I had no clue of. I'm hanging out less and less with CF-ers as a mass (not that I get asked that often too) and I've realized that after my internship, I have almost quite suddenly stop fancying going for CF and CG for that matter. So, its not just there is nothing on my social calender but it also seems like I am choosing not to have anything scribbled on my social calender. Oh what has happened to me??
Back to the topic, the title of this post - Contentment. At the end of CG yesterday, we were asked to choose one word, on how we want this year to be. I took some time to think of it and then I decided its going to be a year of contentment for me. I'm coming to the final lap of my tertiary education this May, which leaves me to around 4 more months here. For my final few months here, I do not want it to be a time where I try even harder to make memories (sound a tad bit cruel no?). The reason I said that is because I wanna let the chips fall where they want, instead of me placing them around. I have come to the reasoning that there is a social hierarchy everywhere, yeap even in a holy place. With that social hierarchy, someone will need to play the Queen B and someone will need to be the underrated ones. People will just need to fill up the hierarchy!
The reason I chose contentment is because ~ whatever my placement/position is in that hierarchy, that will be my placement. I do not want the final few months I have as a student to be spent feeling as if I am entitled to something more and also spent trying and working even harder to move up that hierachy. If I still have a couple of more years to go, maybe. But now, what 4 months of "damage control" can I do, to a society where certain cling to the spot on the hierachy. Yeap, I'm pretty hands off now.
After that, I tossed and turned and it was surprisingly hard to fall asleep. Had been thinking of why am I placed here in Malacca, awful lot this past two weeks or so. And here I thought, I have moved past this topic longggggg agooo. Apparently not! I cannot exactly put a finger on as to why I am here or what am I even doing here. I started reflected back on the past 2 years when I made my move here, all hopeful for a great change, one I had no clue of. I'm hanging out less and less with CF-ers as a mass (not that I get asked that often too) and I've realized that after my internship, I have almost quite suddenly stop fancying going for CF and CG for that matter. So, its not just there is nothing on my social calender but it also seems like I am choosing not to have anything scribbled on my social calender. Oh what has happened to me??
Back to the topic, the title of this post - Contentment. At the end of CG yesterday, we were asked to choose one word, on how we want this year to be. I took some time to think of it and then I decided its going to be a year of contentment for me. I'm coming to the final lap of my tertiary education this May, which leaves me to around 4 more months here. For my final few months here, I do not want it to be a time where I try even harder to make memories (sound a tad bit cruel no?). The reason I said that is because I wanna let the chips fall where they want, instead of me placing them around. I have come to the reasoning that there is a social hierarchy everywhere, yeap even in a holy place. With that social hierarchy, someone will need to play the Queen B and someone will need to be the underrated ones. People will just need to fill up the hierarchy!
The reason I chose contentment is because ~ whatever my placement/position is in that hierarchy, that will be my placement. I do not want the final few months I have as a student to be spent feeling as if I am entitled to something more and also spent trying and working even harder to move up that hierachy. If I still have a couple of more years to go, maybe. But now, what 4 months of "damage control" can I do, to a society where certain cling to the spot on the hierachy. Yeap, I'm pretty hands off now.
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