So, yesterday I thought a day was enough for me get over what happened, but what happened in CF clearly showed I didn't. I hated myself for being so weak. So.Damn.Weak. Its one more reason to add to the bucket of reasons-I-wanna-get-out-of-here-fast.
Like how the heck can I start crying when you walked in halfway during P&W.? Yea, weak, I know. I really wanted so badly to just let people know what happened but I also know if I were to do that, I am not any better than you. A friend told me that I might be traumatized by what happened (maybe I am). I become "unstable" when the incident crosses my mind and for today, it crossed my mind so many times.
Its actually a good thing now that this person is leaving soon, even if it will be the same time as mine. I cannot bear the thought of another person getting that kind of treatment from that first class ass. So, its for the best that this person is leaving. I wont have another junior or friend of mine being "terrorized" like this.
One thing you have that I clearly don't have ~ you have the people's support and favour, people here look at you as this saint who can do no wrong, mature, wise and whatever other crap. I on the other hand, I am considered "noise" whenever I open my mouth and I can feel people going "ohh there she goes again..". Even if I were to blab bout this, who the heck would buy my story.? So yea, go ahead and count yourself lucky. If I have let the adult guard in me down for that moment and told my parents bout this, my dad would have drove here and give you a lecture that will straight knock you to puberty. But, I am an adult. I believe I will deal with you once I am ready. In the meantime, I am also a smart ass who knows how to protect herself.
I am keyboard warrior here but that's cause I don't know how to deal with this properly like an adult, yet.
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