Substance

Everyone is a person of substance, until the person himself/herself proves and behaves otherwise. I would say that there is no need for me to be buddies with someone to classify him or her as substance, one should be given that label from the beginning. I think that's the benefit of the doubt. But once actions or words prove otherwise, you've got to accept that your misconduct is what you will need to live with. 

I rest my case.

Keeping up with MeiTheng

I've been watching so much of Keeping Up With the Kardashians and any shows that has something to do with the Kardashians. Yeap, including Kourtney&Kim Take NY and Khloe&Lamar. Such guilty pleasures. And also the go to post title as I am completely blank now. While we are at the topic of TV series, I've also caught up with the 5th season of The Good Wife ~ goshh Alicia Florrick's brain is so sexy!

Finals of Delta2 and Results
So much has happened since I last posted, it was at a time when preparations for Finals has not even start. Now, Finals are long gone, news of Taylor Swift's Red Tour coming to Malaysia broke, #Sochi2014 started and ended, Finals results are even out and I am already on the final week of my semester break. Passed everything from previous semester *hoorrrayy* with slight increase in my GPA, though my GPA was never to die for to begin with. With me passing every subject I took last semester, that meant I can go into my final semester on time and that leads to me having a good and high chance of graduating on time too! You tell me why I no happy.??? Hahahaha....

Taylor Swift Red Tour
I wanted to go for the Red Tour so badly, so so so mega extremely badly. I was ready to spend my ang pao on getting the tickets too, but sadly I had no one who can confirm if they could go since it's going to be in June, a long period of time to go. The other cray crap part is ~ TICKETS SOLD OUT WITHIN TWO HOURS.!!!! Miss Swift sure has a big following here =D

#Sochi2014 (I had to do the hashtag thing here haha)
Now now, I get to what I might say as the biggest chunk of this post - the 2014 Sochi Winter Olympics!!!! I started watching the Winter Games back in 2006, when I was in Form2 *gahhhh it has been that long eh.??* and I've been following ever since. I remembered how I told my dad to not leave(he was sending me to school btw) because there was ladies' figure skating going on on TV. I saw Sasha Cohen's silver medal performance, cheered and celebrated when Irina Slutskaya fell hahaha (cause I wanted Sasha to win) and witnessed history when a Japanese won gold in this event. I was okay btw, with Arakawa winning, cause speaking as someone-watching-the-sport-for-the-first-time-hence-I-know-nothing, I felt Arakawa's joy, freedom and her authenticity towards her craft. Okok, that was the history of how I started watching the Winter Olympics.

Back to #Sochi2014, of course I rooted for Yuna Kim to win a back to back gold medal, many did in fact. As all would've known by now, she didn't, she skated away with a silver instead. I also rooted for Gracie Gold to medal because I am a #teamusa #ftw kind of a girl. Nahh, I support TeamUSA because of Michelle Kwan (inspiring, so inspiring, the epitome of an American dream) and also how USA dominates the sports that they are in and the honour displayed by their athletes for being part of TeamUSA . I definitely hope and want to see Gold again in PyeongChang 2018, I might even consider making a trip there hahaha...  Davis and White winning ice dancing gold - happiest news ever at this Olympics for me *Go Meryl and Charlie!!!!*. I watch ice dancing because of the Shibutanis, super adorable and talented siblings. Maia has tons of swag yo! I hope the siblings will continue to improve and be household names of their sport and craft and also so that I have nice ice dancing routines to watch lol..

And through this Games, I discovered another event that I will be following - short track speed skating. I saw Apolo Ohno 500m gold medal win at the 2006 Games, but I never followed up with the sport anymore because of my immense interest and adoration towards figure skating. Sochi2014 rolled around, I got interested in short track speed skating again. I do not know how low speed skaters "lean" towards the ice when they are at the curve. Mind boggling hence super interesting. Another reason - JR Celski!! Here's a picture I got from Google and I'll let that do the explaining hehe...

That's what I call a million dollar smile!

But I insist, I still watch the Games for its sporting elements and not just for eye candy kays.? Eye candies are just teeny tiny added bonus...

That's pretty much it for me now, the semester break has been stagnant but I like it because I know the next break I will have will be occupied with job hunting. It sound weird to even say that ~ job hunting. Anyhows, thanks for reading and hoped you gain a thing or two =)

Welcome to Shit Factory

This place is twisted and dirty. Like real dirteyyh! If you come here without much of self confidence, personal integrity and personal conviction, this place would high chance do permanent damage to you. Thankfully, its been more of a preparation of the real shit factory ~ the real working world, where all people chase after is wealth and fame by kissing asses. 

Glad to say that, I've been to where I am today, without kissing asses. Kissing asses are for losers. Of course, my refusal to kiss ass hasn't made me favourite around here nor has it garnered me mainstream success and recognition. If that's a price I pay to have my integrity intact, then that's a pretty cheap price that I would be more than willing to pay. 

Just so you know, when I said its "yours", it really was yours. That huge thing is yours, ain't mine. Honesty came right to you directly when you asked me. Clearly, you were not expecting truth when you asked. Posting a status on Fb and calling me rude ain't gonna make you un-own that piece of thing. News flash, little miss rude here unclogged your piece of thing in the toilet. Why don't you go bitch bout that with your clique of sisters?

#shitfactory #yolo

*clicks Publish*

Contentment

Went for this semester's final CG bible study yesterday night. Wasn't planning to go at first given I have one individual's whose submission is due the next day and I'm far from halfway through. No worries, my assignment is done now. Had to re-do it twice in fact cause I got stuck the first time round. So worried as it was in the wee hours and none of my classmates would be awake, but thankfully I got through and finished it all at around 4am plus.

After that, I tossed and turned and it was surprisingly hard to fall asleep. Had been thinking of why am I placed here in Malacca, awful lot this past two weeks or so. And here I thought, I have moved past this topic longggggg agooo. Apparently not! I cannot exactly put a finger on as to why I am here or what am I even doing here. I started reflected back on the past 2 years when I made my move here, all hopeful for a great change, one I had no clue of. I'm hanging out less and less with CF-ers as a mass (not that I get asked that often too) and I've realized that after my internship, I have almost quite suddenly stop fancying going for CF and CG for that matter.  So, its not just there is nothing on my social calender but it also seems like I am choosing not to have anything scribbled on my social calender. Oh what has happened to me??

Back to the topic, the title of this post - Contentment. At the end of CG yesterday, we were asked to choose one word, on how we want this year to be. I took some time to think of it and then I decided its going to be a year of contentment for me. I'm coming to the final lap of my tertiary education this May, which leaves me to around 4 more months here. For my final few months here, I do not want it to be a time where I try even harder to make memories (sound a tad bit cruel no?). The reason I said that is because I wanna let the chips fall where they want, instead of me placing them around. I have come to the reasoning that there is a social hierarchy everywhere, yeap even in a holy place. With that social hierarchy, someone will need to play the Queen B and someone will need to be the underrated ones. People will just need to fill up the hierarchy!

The reason I chose contentment is because ~ whatever my placement/position is in that hierarchy, that will be my placement. I do not want the final few months I have as a student to be spent feeling as if I am entitled to something more and also spent trying and working even harder to move up that hierachy. If I still have a couple of more years to go, maybe. But now, what 4 months of "damage control" can I do, to a society where certain cling to the spot on the hierachy. Yeap, I'm pretty hands off now.

Ushering 2014

Last day of 2013, hooorrraayyyyy....? Notice the question mark at the end? See, that's something that I am not really getting here. Its the last day of a year, a year in the life of XXX, it means something, no?

I don't know if I am blowing New Year's Eve gathering and parties out of proportion, but I am quite sick of hearing some say its "just another day" and they add on a "get over it" as well. I can't bear the thought that some sees it as a day to just get by or get over with. It sounds real pathetic to me that one can opt to just watch dramas in their room to usher in a new year. End a year and start a whole new year on a good note, no? Your birthday and no one does anything for you, its just another day and you should just get over it. Can I use the same reasoning on that? We celebrate the birth of a Saviour on Christmas, but its just another day and just get over it. Again, can I use the same reasoning for this situation as well. 

I remembered a year where my family just got home from a New Year Eve's party at a relatives place, endless amount of food served and countdown done. Once we got home, I got into a fight with my brother about something, trivial I might add. Lo and behold, my dad came into the picture and we got a real good lesson. I clearly remembered him saying this "First day of 20XX and you wanna start with a fight!". 

Same difference here I guess. First day of 2014 and you wanna start by getting it over with. First day of 2014 and you wanna spend it rotting at home. 

FYI, I am not asking for a sophisticated and lavish, all out bash to be thrown to usher in a new year kays?

The #roc3embrace Journey Pt. 3

.: long, panjang lebar written post ahead :.

I wouldn't have thought that throughout directing and backup singing for ROC3 would only produce 2 blog posts! Yes, ROC3 has ended. I can't believe its has come to live on stage and curtain has been called.. *is there such a thing? Its meant to be curtain call but you get what I'm trying to convey*. 

Its amazing to have my family in the audience, I guess its their first time in a very long time seeing me get involved in something artsy. Sadly, they missed the opening and they came in halfway through Prelude. So, in a way they didn't get to see me on stage *laugh out loud*. Was quite nervous for the opening, first time solo singing on stage with mics *phew*. Really enjoyed playing the role of a "ballet flat wearing Greek goddess in a maroon peter-pan collared, mullet dress". Embrace's opening was derived from The Gospel Truth from Hercules and I must say, its definitely a different kind of opening than what was done in previous musicals. 

Standing at where the backup singers stood, my eyes were glued to the stage. How to not look there anyways? Mega proud of everyone, they gave their best and if there was mistakes, the cover ups were superb! Hearing how the crowd goes was encouraging at the same time funny. My dad was reminded of his youth hearing some of the songs that was included in this year's production. Really glad that there was something that he relates to. 

Serving with my other 5 scriptwriters were an experience on its own. I would admit that it wasn't all sunshine and rainbows throughout the 8 weeks of practices and the additional 3 to 4 weeks of script writing prior to that. There were times that we differed in opinions but I am thankful that we are united. In vision, direction and also in having each other's backs. It was amazing seeing how we differ in terms of music taste and imagination but yet, it came out in one really awesome-ly merged script.

I struggled with being gracious-equally to all my cast. The Alphas were pretty much in the safe zone as I gave them the "you're a junior" ticket. The seniors, on the other hand, I expected them deliver. There is a line in the musical which was said by the character Emma "I believe in working my way..". I personally have that mindset towards people who are, hmm how should I put this, "there". For those that I consider "there", its in my understanding/logic that they have clock in their hours, braved through storms, paid their dues and worked their way to where they are now, which is "there". "Up there" to be precise. And when you are "there", its preferable that you better not be a waste of space. 

I had a relatively rough time accepting that things are handed to certain people almost like on a platter. I know its rather ironic to think that I was handpicked by God himself to write a story on the subject of grace. Grace, aside from it something given to us when we are so undeserving of it,  its also something that is freely given to all by God himself, almost like on a platter. Then one day, it just hit me. Why bother being unhappy of how God chose to bless others? Its their blessings and God blesses me in His own special way too! Seen or unseen, His blessings are indeed upon my life. Its my pathetic nature to choose to compare blessings with the people around me. I wouldn't say I am completely over it, but I believe now I have clarity that I never had before. 

The #roc3embrace Journey Pt. 2

Reporting to you blog readers live from the workstation of a director. This is the story of ROC3 practices thus far as of 19th of November 2013.

Just entered Week 5 of my academic calender and I just sat for one of my midterm yesterday - BBL2014 Business Law. Technically, the musical is 3 more weeks away as booking for the main hall has been APPROVED.! Having main hall approved meant that the musical is happening on the 9th of December 2013 and it will be my first time doing a musical in that main hall. I must say that Main Hall doesn't look as nice as Rumah Media (where I had my first ROC experience), but this is the venue that every musical is intended to be held at, in campus.

To be honest, I've been having this "I wanna get things done" mentality quite a lot, more than I should. You see, I intended ROC3 to be this great journey of faith, where I expected great trials and problems to actually come up that would make me rely on God more. Not to say that things have been easy peasy but I've been doing well with the "get things done" mentality. Like the other how Sally shared that different musicals will have different issues, like how during ROC2, she felt picked on. Cast and crews will make comments on the blog that she is in charge of, the transport list etc.

According to her, this time round for ROC3, its costumes that are problematic. Costume arrangements are done by me. For me all this while when casts come to me and say they wanna change something and all, I thought it was just the nature of making costume arrangements. It never occurred to me that I was picked on. Upon knowing I might have been indirectly "picked on", multiple thoughts ran through my mind, like how I know I am not a mainstream face here and how because of that, people are not having an easy time accepting the arrangements that I have came up with. I, all of a sudden had all the reason in the world to believe that - No, its not my costume arrangements that have major problem, the major problem is they or some of them anyways, have a problem with the person assigning costumes this time round and that's me.

But you know what, I trust the good taste that God gave me and also the eyes that my other directors have when they come to me wanting to amend costumes in their scene. I am trying to not be arrogant of this position, responsibility and authority given to me, I am just trying to stay firm and protect the vision I've had in mind. In fact, I will try my best also in staying tough while being picked on.

Picked on.? Nah, I intend to work closely with clothes in the future, all the unpleasant things coming my way now I take it as the nature of the task. Do note also that I know how to protect my vision and at the same time know how to consider what amendments are valid and which are not.

The #roc3embrace Journey Pt. 1

This is the Embrace journey as of 7th November 2013. It's Week 3 of my academic calender now, so that means that I have survived Intensive Week together with Week 1 and 2 of ROC practices. Being a scene director, costume director and a backup singer has been packed with experience so far. Intensive Week was not as tough as how I initially imagined, hugely thanks to this current batch of juniors. Not just are they attentive and ready to listen to orders, their enthusiasm, work ethic, professionalism and curiosity has been encouraging to me. They just have so much energy that they stay even when they do not have practices. Like, are you guys kidding meyh.?? 

Been quite happy with the choreography though changes still occur here and there, thanks to my late night Youtubing session, not so with singing because of #macamyestapibukan cases. But there's nothing that can't be whipped to perfection. I am so prepared to be hated >.< To date, we only had one full dress rehearsal, and I truly believe that costumes does bring out a character. Not to sound cocky, but for a first full dress rehearsal, I think the costumes I assigned looked pretty good. HAHAHAHA.. I allow you to laugh and let go of the urge to punch me in the face for 3 seconds. 

Thinking back of how I was as a junior here, I did none of those sort of things. Whenever I do not have scenes, all I do is rush home and get some sleeepppp. I wasn't into availing myself for "girly hangouts" cause they were not my kind of hangout. Fingers crossed for greater productivity to come, both in scene practices and also backup singing practice. Got assigned to sing one of Glee's done-so-right songs so YESSS.!!! I always felt inadequate (one way or another) because of the usual, I-don't-play-any-instruments or I-never-sang-or-joined-a-choir, but I am glad I made up for that through my dad's upbringing on me. Thank goodness I have a dad who listens and appreciated the music of his generation and I guess through that I gained an appreciation not just for the music of his generation but eventually mine as well. How many souls out there can appreciate Bieber? 

But yeah, I know how to fake swag when needed. No amount of formal music education can teach you that. You learn that by hearing your dad sing for fun in the car lols. ROC3 is gonna so kick-ass.!!

Falling Like a Piece of "Nangka"

There was this episode that I had few years back when the people in my batch did an ice skating trip. After numerous rounds on the ice just to be more "fluid" but still skating like a log of wood, two Malay boys were skating behind me and one all of a sudden fell. The one that did not fall laughed and said "bagai nangka jatuh". Translated it means falling like a piece of nangka *dukkk*. That was something that I laughed about for weeks and my batch mates wouldn't let it go as well. That was few years back.

Yesterday, Friday (30th Aug 2013) the CF did a Running Men inspired game. I do not watch Running Men but the gist I got from people was its a game of a team chasing a hiding team. I was paired with a junior and she led the pairing. That is till I fell flat hahaha... The pain is bearable but after spending some time watching Michelle Kwan in the 2002 Olympics free skate, where she fell and just got back up to continue with the program, woooowww, MeiTheng you're a piece of tofu =.=

Skaters falling because of not landing on their jumps basically redefined "nangka jatuh" and how they get on with their program is mind blasting. My case of just a simple fall and I walk with bent knees and ouches here and there...

How is that possible? Overall watching figure skating for the first time in a long time was really fun for me. I still remember what the jumps are called and the spins etc. My childhood =))

"We Are Going Back Now"

Attended MMU's 14th Convocation yesterday. The day started off a little bumpy but am glad that it worked out in the end. Came to Cyber campus slightly later than I expected so by the time I reached, dear Esther has already entered the Grand Hall and the rest were going off to get some lunch, both Malaccans and Cyberians. I just followed because that was where everyone is.

Do note that I write this because I need an outlet to let it out and also because the friends that I call whenever things happened are not available to pick up my call at the moment. I do not intend to hold it in because I don't know what kind of damage it would do to me. Yes, I sayang myself that much and if that makes me a bitch, you're a bitch as well just because I can love myself that much. I guess I am writing this because what actually happened, "the not so good" part affected me one way or another. Trust me, I tried self psycho-ing last night, I didn't work as much as I wanted it too. So the story goes like this...

After lunch at Shaftbury's Subway, I thought all were going to head back to campus; my security and guarantee was with the Engineering Faculty from Malacca as there are graduates that we know from there. Malaccans are strange (at this part, kindly leave should you be offended), they are willing to travel 4 hours and just spend 2 hours plus at the place they traveled to. Unfortunately, my security blanket did not secure me enough. They were all heading back right after lunch (meaning from Subway) and they are not planning to wait for the engineers from Malacca (hahah) to come out from the hall after being "convocated". I panicked for a split second, but then I asked Jerome if he would be okay with me cramming in his car. He was ok with it. Scott who was supposed to be in the same car as Jerome decided to overnight in his own place in PJ so that the journey back to Malacca would be so bad. 

The fault might have also been from me since I came late to campus but if this was a mainstream face, the whole kampung would have waited just so she/he gets what they wanted. And being mainstream really does get you places because people will automatically be more thoughtful of your plight and be extra sacrificial. 

I worked real hard to toughen up against what would have hurt me two years ago and I did. The success rate of this is not a 100% so for the times that I am affected, I can say I am affected bad. Basically, when it doesn't affect me, it just doesn't. But when it does, I am wreck.