Romantically Deprived

One more paper to go for midterm and after I would be midterms free. Someone is gonna get so fluffed up because the title above was "coined" by him. 

I don't know how discrete should one be about something that people already know but none is talking about it publicly. Its a topic that many are unwilling to initiate, but once initiated *poof* hottest topic you can get I think. Anyhow, there will be a major project again this year by the CF and this time round, I'm a "scriptwriter". Not "Bimbo Nurse" or "Kid at Orphanage" or "Non-Playable Character". For now its "scriptwriter", other roles/posts I shall reveal later if any =P 

I have written scripts before, a few times here and there. Written more than what was actually staged or acted out. This would be the biggest script and production that I will be writing to date. Since it will be from scratch and being in a position where you can have a little say at how you want the story to be or go, no doubt you will put up things that you would like to see. Right no.? I had been persistent on a particular matter since day 1 but in the end, it was decided that what I wanted up on display will not get the green light. So that particular thing I wanted so badly, earned me the label of "romantically deprived".

As a person who appreciates art, I'm eager to see where this project will take me. Strange to see myself being the one pushing others now, instead of being the one pushed. Will be cruel or even unrealistic of me to want people to perform like the cast of Glee or dance like the contestants in So You Think You Can Dance. Especially in the area of dance. I am no dancer (I go from saying I have two left legs to the ground is shaking) and heck, I never took ballet before also. But, I have appreciated seeing performances where dancers really stretch as far as they can. You should be able to tell that I like those contemporary ballet or lyrical dance performances by now.  Whatever that I cannot do physically, does not mean I can't picture it in my mind. If there is a piece that I can co-choreograph (mannn, the head director must have that much faith in me), I'm gonna push them to stretch their legs further or jump and leap as high and far as they can. That's in the dance department. Be ready for status quos to be challenged.!

To the journey of script writing, whhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeee~~~~

Rekindle the Fire

That is one thing that impacted me in church today. That three words, the rest of the sermon, I have forgotten or I wasn't paying much attention to begin with. So that three words sealed the deal for me. 

No activities has been carried out for the "thing" that I said yes to yet, but I sure hope that when it does, I will be enthusiastic and positive about it. Its gonna be a role that has much bigger responsibilities that the one I held in the previous production. 

I am not an outstanding figure in leadership, but I don't think I suck big time as well. In student activities/productions, unlike a real job where food on the table is determined by how you do your job, its easy for students or US, to not have much motivation. I once led a group of people who 1) had another language medium as mine. It was bearable at first, I could contain the Grammar Nazi in me. Then after my internship, its irritating to hear people not "speaking properly". They were also of a different kind of work ethic and frequency. They came to meeting multiple times unprepared and when I come to claim their work, they are honest enough to tell me not to worry. I didn't wanna take cheap shots at them or to tell them how to use their time. It was at their own conscience. So, I am not terrible neither am I great. I hope to be open to learning and growth but give me a crowd like that, I just won't be able to be effective and efficient in my work. 

By availing myself for this production in my final year, its definitely a risk. I might have a clue on how demanding this journey would be but not the biggest and clearest picture. Like how the title suggest, its a step (quite a big one actually) that I am taking to rekindle the fire for God. To what lies ahead, its gonna be kick-ass (most used words at the moment).

Welcome to the New Age...

Brrrr, post and title has no relations. That is what happens when I don't know what to name a post and Youtubing at the same time. *Radioactive (cover) by Clara C*

There are a few things that has been on my mind regarding this space here. After so blogging for almost 2 years now, I find my blog not being like those commercial blogs that I follow. It has been somehow an outlet for me to let out anger, frustrations and ramblings. I want a happpeeeyyyhhh blog where I share happy stuff, where I put good things out there. But no, that's so not the case here. I mean, where are my attempts of #OOTD posts. See, I follow fashion blogs where bloggers blog bout the personal style, their vacations, their foodie adventures and I have a weakness for such blogs. Major weakness. Till today, I have never taken a full #ootd shot. Too shy to be in front of the camera. With time and lost of hope, hopefully, I can turn this blog around as I have no plans on moving to a new blog. Don't worry, I will still bitch bout nonsense and crap that is affecting me here.

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There was this incident of me "holding the wrong key at the wrong time" back when I was in Gamma2. Its Delta1 now, so that would be approximately 2 semesters ago. I was holding the key to this study space that me and a bunch of my friends frequent. I was there one night, trying to be a nerd and study for my upcoming Finals. Studying, studying, I halfway got a call from a senior which after that phone call conversation I would call a jackass. So, innocent MeiTheng, studying so hard for Finals got a call from a soon to be jackass senior. Jackass senior on the other line was the epitome of rude and uncivilized. Like my goodness, didn't you learn anything bout manners growing up.? Who on earth talks to a girl, as a matter of fact people like this - "I wanna make myself clear and I don't wanna repeat myself so you listen carefully here. I want the keys to be in my hands by tonight. You understand that or not?". Maybe just maybe, you never learned manners growing up. Stupid me, I got traumatized by that phone call. To think, the keys were in my hands. If I wanted to play games, he would have needed to play by my rules. I could have played hide and seek with him and be a diva and demand him to talk properly.

So that was one. Then there was the no-balls apology this person pulled off. He was already there in the study space when I reached. This was few nights later btw. He pulled his friend along when he apologized to me. Oh mai, brother, where are your balls.??? Like seriously.? Where the heck were they.? So bravely lecture me over the phone and this is the apology you pulled off.?

Months passed and I lived a kick ass life through my internship. After my internship and for my final year, I moved into my own single room, in a house with people I know. Then it was CG, and he is a close friend of one of my housemates. He was chit chatting with my housemate and when he saw me at the hall, I sensed he felt awkward. I said "Hi" and its like he wanted to leave my porch so fast. What a waste right? Inflicting awkwardness on your own. It shows that he knows his apology was bullshit, because if he sees his apology as valid, he wouldn't have felt so awkward to stand at my porch longer. You brought this on yourself brother and I am going to be around. Don't mess with me yo! #YOLO